The holidays can be a beautiful season of joy, but for those grieving, they often amplify feelings of loss. I know this firsthand. Nine years ago, I lost my dad unexpectedly. It was a grief so deep that the idea of "choosing happy" felt impossible.
But through that journey, I discovered something powerful: while happiness can feel out of reach, fulfillment is always there, waiting to be noticed.
I found strength in the love of my husband, kids, mom, and brothers—and in the memories of my dad. Our relationship was built on showing up fully for one another, and even in his absence, that love remains. It’s a reminder that while grief is heavy, the fulfillment of love and connection can still shine through, even in unexpected ways.
If you’re navigating grief this holiday season, I want you to know I’m here for you, lifting you in all the love and light. Grief can feel overwhelming, but you are not alone.
Here are a few ways to help you anchor yourself during this season:
Acknowledge your feelings: Grief is not linear, and it’s okay to feel a mix of emotions. Give yourself permission to feel without judgment.
Focus on fulfillment: Reflect on the love, relationships, and moments that bring meaning to your life. Fulfillment lasts even when happiness feels far away.
Create meaningful rituals: The first Christmas after we lost my dad, we did a fun mystery gift exchange in his honor. Everyone wrapped up something Dad would have loved, and we spent the night laughing, sharing stories, and celebrating his life. I also kept a candle by his photo that I lit every day to honor his light. Since 2015, I’ve kept fresh hydrangeas in my house to celebrate his love. Rituals like these can be a beautiful way to honor your loved ones and keep their spirit alive.
Seek support: You don’t have to go through this alone.
Reach out to trusted friends and family. Let them know how you’re feeling, even if it’s just to say, “I’m struggling today.”
Consider professional support. I found an amazing life coach, Heather White, during my time of grief. She helped me navigate it all and reignite my light. She’s the reason I’m doing what I’m doing today.
Many find comfort in faith, and I leaned on church during my grieving process. It gave me strength and hope to keep moving forward.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, there are also resources you can call, like the National Helpline for Mental Health at 1-800-662-HELP (4357), which offers confidential support.
For those supporting someone who is grieving:
If you know someone who is grieving, don’t hesitate to bring up their loved one. Early on, I noticed people avoided mentioning my dad, worried it would upset me. The truth is, hearing their stories and celebrating his life often brought me happy tears.
Here are a few ways you can support someone grieving:
Acknowledge their loss: Don’t ignore the obvious. Let them know you’re thinking about them and their loved one.
Share memories: Tell a favorite story about their loved one. It can spark joy and remind them how much their loved one mattered to others.
Ask if they want to talk: Give them the space to share if they feel like it. A simple, “Would you like to talk about them?” can mean so much.
Offer small gestures of care: Bring over a meal, write them a note, or leave a thoughtful gift. These acts of kindness can help them feel supported.
Be patient: Grief is unpredictable. Sometimes, just sitting with them in silence is the most comforting thing you can do.
I’ve also included a special gift for you: a downloadable chapter from my book called The Christmas Epiphany. It’s about my own journey through grief and the moment I discovered the difference between happiness and fulfillment.
During this holiday season, I hope you’ll find moments of peace, connection, and light.
Fulfillment is your life raft—it carries us through the darkest times with the love and memories we hold dear. I’m sending you love, grace, and strength as you navigate this season.
With all my love and my heart – just keep shining your light. You are loved. You are enough.
xoxo-Tara
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