Butterfly Goal Effect
When my grandmother wrote the words “Be Who You Came To Be. Love will guide you” to my son, it was easy parenting advice: let him try new things, explore, fail, and discover who he is. We tried every sport, music lesson, karate class, and art camp. It wasn’t about being the best...it was about sparking joy, curiosity, and growth.
But somewhere along the way, as adults, many of us stop. We check the boxes - school, career, family - and then we stop dreaming for ourselves. We stop doing the little things that light us up. And that’s where the Butterfly Goal Effect comes in.
Butterfly goals don’t have to be life-changing or world-shaking.
They can be as simple as trying something fun you’ve always wanted to do. And yet, they create a cosmic chain reaction - igniting authenticity, confidence, and pure joy not just for you, but for everyone around you.
This past weekend, I saw the Butterfly Goal Effect in full motion. For my husband’s 50th, Scott- who has always loved air guitar- took the stage at Jon Bon Jovi’s bar in Nashville. With a packed house cheering him on, he performed to “Sweet Child O’ Mine.” He was lit up. Our friends were lit up. The whole bar went wild.
And it wasn’t just Scott. My friend Hope has always dreamed of line dancing with the Urban Cowboy on Broadway. Even though it was pouring rain, when the dancers showed up at 10:30 pm, she ran out, danced in the rain, and made her dream a reality. The joy on her face was unforgettable.
Here’s the emotional intelligence lesson:
Joy is contagious. When you light yourself up, you light up others.
Self-regard grows when we honor our passions, no matter how small.
Curiosity and play keep us authentic and connected- not just to others, but to ourselves.
So, my challenge to you this week: what’s one butterfly goal you’ve been holding back on? Big or small, silly or serious- give yourself permission to go for it. Because being who you came to be isn’t about arriving. It’s about continuing to dream, explore, and ignite joy along the way.
I’m hitting the road and would love to see you! My Be Who You Came to Be book tour is bringing live events, Q&A sessions, and some serious inspiration straight to your city. First stop...Chicago!
Check the dates, grab your spot, and let’s talk about becoming the person you were meant to be—together.
