Back to School Isn't Just a Reset for Kids
Back to school feels different this year. I have a sophomore and a senior... Ben’s last year before college.
How did we get here? It feels like yesterday I was walking them into kindergarten, backpacks bigger than their bodies, hoping they’d find a friend. We’ve navigated elementary school Valentine’s parties, middle school locker drama, and the teenage years filled with late-night homework, sports schedules, curfews, and first heartbreaks.
And while I promise I’m not too emotional about having a senior… if you follow me on Instagram, you already know I’ll be fully exploiting #SeniorSunday for the next nine months.
From day one, I’ve tried to raise my boys to be who they came to be - not who I wanted them to be, not who their dad wanted them to be, not who the world told them to be. That’s meant encouraging them to explore who they are, navigate the ups and downs, embrace wins and failures, and learn from every twist in the road.
Over the years, I’ve given them little age-appropriate EQ “nudges” to help them along the way. Here are some of my favorites. You can share these with your kids (and maybe even yourself).
For the little years (Lower School)
Name it to tame it. When they couldn’t explain what was wrong, I’d help them put words to their feelings... mad, sad, nervous... so they could talk it out instead of melting down.
Kindness is cool. I’d challenge them to do one kind thing each day for someone else, even if it was as small as holding a door or sharing a snack.
For the in-between years (Middle School)
Breathe before you bite. Middle school can be a drama factory. I’d remind them to pause before firing off a text or saying something they’d regret.
Find your people. Not everyone will be your friend. That’s okay. Look for the ones who see you, value you, and make you laugh until your cheeks hurt.
For the high school years
Show up like it matters - because it does. Be on time. Be prepared. Be respectful. Those small habits open big doors.
Flip the script. When negative self-talk shows up, replace “I can’t” with “I’m learning” or “I’ll try again.”
And for us as parents:
Model what you want to see. Our kids are always watching how we handle stress, joy, and setbacks. Let them see you pause before reacting, admit mistakes, and celebrate the small wins.
Create connection in the chaos. Even on the busiest days, protect little moments - a drive with no phones, dinner at the table, or a late-night “how was your day?” on the couch.
Back to school isn’t just a reset for kids - it’s a reminder for all of us. Being who you came to be takes practice, patience, and a whole lot of grace. But it’s worth it.
Because at the end of the day, the greatest gift we can give our kids isn’t the path we want for them - it’s the belief, tools, and confidence to walk their own.
